November 20, 2012 § Leave a comment

This is Part V in a five-part series by attorney and mediator Lydia Quarles with some insights into how you can help ensure success in your domestic mediation.


When I am mediating a domestic issue, I always begin the first caucus with this question to the party: “If you could be your own judge — and I know that you would be reasonable and fair, knowing that you cannot have it all – how would you determine the issues that face you and the other party, and why would you do it that way?”

Prepare your client to be able to identify the issues that must be resolved for mediation to be effective, and how he/she would resolve them and why. The ability to communicate this to the mediator can go a long way in preparing your client to understand that there is give and take in mediation that there will not be in a trial. It also prepares your client to be reasonable and sensitive in approaching emotional issues.

Remind him/her that things can be resolved in mediation that cannot even be broached in a courtroom and if some of those things are of significance to him/her, this is the opportunity to discuss them and sort them out.


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You are currently reading MEDIATION THAT WORKS, PART V: THE $64,000 QUESTION at The Better Chancery Practice Blog.


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