Six Legal Haikus

August 16, 2013 § 2 Comments

Six wicked verses on the practice …

Measuring Time

Remember sun, moon,
day, night, week, year? Now it’s all
six-minute increments.

Employment Rates

Well-meaning friends ask,
“What type law will you practice?”
Any type that hires

The Lawyer’s Spouse

That won’t work on me;
I’m not opposing counsel.
“Objection” my ass.

Cease and Desist

50 paragraphs,
300 commas, therefores,
Just to say: Stop it.

Conference Call

“This guy’s a dumbass,”
I said after hitting mute.
Oops. Didn’t hit mute.

Personal Injury Lawyer

Am ambulance wails.
“Shouldn’t you be chasing that?”
My friends are assholes.

From Poetic Justice: Legal Humor in Verse, by J.D. Dupuy and M.L. Philpott, 2013

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§ 2 Responses to Six Legal Haikus

  • Joy Harkness says:

    Ben’s comment and the conference call made me remember an incident that happened to me several years ago when I was practising in Hattiesburg and raising my former stepson. My secretary told me that Judge Sebe Dale was on line one and my son on line two. I answered line two by saying “How’s my favorite man?” I had intended to quickly tell my son that I would call him back. There was a long pause before Judge Dale said, “I am well, and you?”

  • Ben McMurtray says:

    One week on the job and I can relate to each of these except for the conference call. Luckily that hasn’t happened… yet.

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