Advice for a Young Lawyer
August 9, 2013 § 15 Comments
Now that they have the bar exam behind them, we will soon welcome as colleagues the latest crop of young lawyers.
Before they get swallowed up by the demands of their new profession, I thought I would offer some advice on how to be a lawyer and a happy person at the same time. One or two of you who have been in the gristmill for a while may find some of these ideas useful for yourself.
1. Focus on your own story.
You are in the legal profession because you are competitive to some degree. So when you’re struggling, it’s hard to hear that a colleague just hit a million-dollar fee, or a former law school classmate landed a high-paying job. It’s not mere envy you feel; it’s something like the same feeling a runner gets seeing a competitor break the tape 10 yards ahead.
Yes, it’s difficult not to focus on others’ gains when they are the talk of the courthouse. The danger is that, when you focus on other people’s stories, you tend to lose sight of your own.
Most of what happens in your life is a product of the choices you make. That means that you get to write your own story. You get to define the main character, and you decide the plot, the supporting cast, and the style of the story.
From time to time, stop to read back over your story. How is it going? Do you like the characters? Do you like the way the plot is developing? Should some characters be replaced? How about the tone; is it what you want? Do some parts need to be rewritten or the plot revised to move in a more satisfying direction?
Take stock of your own accomplishments. Evaluate where you are in terms of your goals. Give yourself credit for how far you’ve come. Let the achievements of others inspire you to greater heights, but focus on your own goals and how to accomplish them.
Savor what you have, whether great or meager, and foster a spirit of thankfulness. Most of us, even in modest circumstances, enjoy far more than we will ever really need.
And remember that the practice of law is not a zero-sum game. When one lawyer “wins,” that does not mean that all other lawyers “lose.”
2. Work for more than a paycheck.
No matter what you read to the contrary, it’s true that your work does define you. It can define you as a greedy, money-grubbing blood-sucker. Or it can define you as a person who makes a difference in the lives of those with whom you come into contact, in your profession, and in your community.
Early in your career you need to make shrewd choices about the work you will do that will define you. One of the advantages of the law is that you have great control over the kind of work that you will do that will define you. You get to choose work that will fulfill you.
Choose to do work that will add value to your clients and yourself. I am not talking about value in terms of dollars, although earning a living is important. I am talking about making sure that your work makes your clients’ lives better and makes you a better person. I am talking about working for more than a paycheck.
When all you work for is a paycheck, the only thing in your work that you have to look forward to is payday.
The practice of law takes up a large percentage of your waking life (and sleeping life, for that matter). Do legal work that adds something more than income to your life. Consciously try to make a difference for the good, to leave things better than when you found them. You’ll find yourself a happier, more productive and more complete person.
3. Find balance.
You may have to work 70 hours a week when you first start practicing, simply because, as you will find, law school merely introduced you to the law and taught you how to think like a lawyer. Only by actually practicing law, however, do you to learn how to be a lawyer. And that takes an investment of time.
But as you grow into lawyerhood and become more efficient, you need to pare down the hours you work to make room in your life for some living.
Balance out your law time with family, church, friends, exercise, and quiet time. Paint landscapes. Garden. Cook out. Read something trashy. Listen to music. Go fishing. Get out of town. Bake a cake. Go to a movie. Go out to eat. Hug your kids. Have a romantic evening. Sit under a shady oak tree and watch the clouds. Take a walk. Pray. Nap. Have a tall glass of sweet tea. Enjoy.
And when I say balance, I mean balance. It does no good to squeeze exercise into your life only for it to become an obsession. The same goes for any other endeavors you work into your picture.
4. Be positive; let loose your hatred and resentments.
It’s easy for lawyers to become cynical and distrustful, to question others’ motives, and to harbor hatred and resentments.
The more we let the darkness into our lives, the more the light is driven out.
Try to focus on the positive. Take note of the negatives, the hurts, the slights and outrageous conduct of others, and learn from them. And then let them go. Let them go and free yourself from them. When you harbor hatred and resentment, you are held hostage by the very person or thing you hate or resent.
5. Keep your worries and fears in perspective.
Mark Twain said, “I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them have never happened.”
Worries and fears can be paralyzing. Of course, kept in perspective they can be motivating. But too often we let them grow into specters that loom so large that they choke out our judgment and ability to act.
The fact is that most of our worries and fears never come to be. The sooner you take that to heart and live by it the sooner you will be free of their shackles. The sooner you shrink you worries and fears down to their proper size in your life the sooner you will lose the driving need to control everything and everyone in your life.
6. Difficulties are opportunities.
Losing a case, disappointing a client, making a mistake, angering a judge; all are part and parcel of practicing law. Get over them, set them aright, and move on to the next thing.
The difficulties and struggles of the practice of law are the forces that sculpt you into the kind of lawyer that you will grow to be. How you react to those forces will determine whether you become a polished work of art or a pile of dust.
Every lawyer has a bad day. Decide that you will not let it be any more than that. Adjust to it, set what is wrong aright, and move on to the next thing.
It’s called the practice of law because it’s a never-ending, ever-evolving process of daily lessons and new possibilities, no matter how long you’ve been in the profession. Every obstacle presents an opportunity to find a new way, to use your ingenuity and creativity, to offer a new solution.
7. Seek happiness that will endure.
Material goods can make us happy. The delicious aroma of leather in a new BMW, the sleek grain of mahogany in your new office table, Ben & Jerry’s Red Velvet Cake ice cream, and a new pair of Italian shoes, are all sensory pleasures that we can all appreciate.
The happiness that material goods bring us, however, is like cotton candy. Soon after the pleasurable flavor and sugar high dissipate, we are left with nothing of substance.
You will find that the happiness that will endure comes from what enriches your mind and spirit. Money will not do it. Fame and material goods will not do it. You will have to discover for yourself what truly enriches your own mind and spirit. As you do, you will find a deep happiness that will sustain you through life’s changes. The more you nurture that kind of happiness, the stronger and more substantive person you will become.
Seek happiness that will endure. Seek richness in mind and spirit. There you will find contentment.
8. Grow where you’re planted.
Many law students I have spoken with say that they have chosen the legal profession because they want to make a difference in the world. It’s a deceptively large ambition.
Most lawyers learn in a short time after law school that it’s almost impossible to change much in the world, and, in fact, most of the changing is done to the young lawyer instead. That’s okay. It’s an important lesson to learn. Most of us will have very little impact on the world at large.
That’s due in large part to the simple fact that most of us move in small circles, in small towns, in a small state. So how can one make a real difference in such microscopic circumstances?
To make a real difference, start with your immediate environment. You can influence your family, clients, fellow lawyers, judges, clerks, church, community, and everyone with whom you come into contact, through your attitude, thoughtfulness, professionalism, good judgment, values, humor, humility, character, patience, faithfulness, kindness, and joy.
You will find that the ripples you send out as you make a splash in your little world will radiate out for good or ill. So make sure they are for good.
Ambition is a professional hazard of lawyers. You will see that some lawyers are never satisfied with the small stage they are on, and the role they have to play. They are always anxious and fretful that they are missing out on the bigger show.
If you can tailor your own ambitions to fit the scope of the life that you have chosen, you will free yourself of many needless anxieties that sap your energy and enthusiasm, and drain your happiness and joy.
When you decide to grow where you are planted, you will find yourself content to make your little world a better, more fulfilling place. You will have made a difference. You will find happiness in that.
9. Avoid sharp objects.
People who juggle sharp knives usually get cut.
People who associate with negative, demanding, hurtful, self-centered, boastful, spiteful, selfish, unfaithful, vengeful, dishonest, envious, greedy, abusive, conniving, bitter, crafty, controlling, self-entitled, passive-aggressive, manipulative, lazy, bigoted, crazy, cynical, gossipy, angry, narrow-minded, or shallow individuals are like people who juggle sharp knives.
Sure, you will encounter all of those kinds of people as clients, colleagues, judges, in church, and in your daily comings and goings, but that does not mean that they have to be involved in your life. Deal with them as you must, in due course, and then move on to something, and someone, else.
Eschew those kinds of people like you would dangerous objects, because their friendship or involvement in your life is, indeed, fraught with danger. They will poison your attitude and your happiness, and they will kill your spirit if they can.
10. Appearances can be deceiving.
You will find that there are lawyers who will look down on you because you don’t wear the right suits or shoes, or don’t drive the right car, or don’t belong to the right firm, or don’t handle the right kind of cases.
Those poor people see only what is on the surface, when the real value is what is in your mind and soul.
Pay them no mind. Waste no time or effort trying to ingratiate yourself with them. You will never succeed because they need your perceived inferiority to maintain their perceived superiority.
Their values are empty. Reject them. Instead, concentrate on enriching yourself in all the things that do matter and generate enduring happiness. You will be a better person – and lawyer – for it.
The Better Chancery Practice Blog 
[…] Lawyers are driven to accomplish. We are ambitious and goal-driven. Sometimes in pursuing lofty goals, though, we can lose sight of the opportunities we have to make a difference. The importance of making a difference in your own little slice of the universe is something about which I have posted here previously. […]
Thank you so much for that…hopefully, I will be starting my practice next year, and that advice is so helpful in setting up for myself!
You’re welcome. I hope to call you “colleague” when the time comes. Let me know how you fare.
I passed the Bar, and am starting my own practice now. I still look at this to help me keep my sense of balance. Again, thank you for this!
Congrats, colleague. Always remember the ideals that led you here. Best wishes.
I’ve probably read this five times since you posted it. I just hope that as I move along in my career I can keep what you’ve said in mind. Thank you.
Thanks.
Useful to everyone, I think!
This is really good advice Judge. Right on point.
I am not a lawyer: I am a Professional Engineer. The advice however is spot-on. Thank you wor a well written and thoughtful article
I’m printing this off and putting in my top drawer. Every Monday morning, I will read a section and contemplate upon it. New lawyers should definitely read this, but those of us who have been in the trenches for 10 or more years are able to relate to and understand it. Very, very powerful stuff there, Judge. Thank you.
This is a very helpful, blog, Judge Primeaux, for lawyers young and old!
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